agency and guidance

i have not spoken in sacrament meeting since i was in young women's. 

ai carrrrrumba!

if you care to read what i will be sharing in approximately 12 hours, here she is. 

i realize this is probably unorthodox for a blog but do i care? this week, not really at all. 

 

The topic I have been given is an interesting one, and a tender spot for me. When Brother Carey asked me to speak I excitedly acquiesced but when I read the email stating the topic, part of me wanted to resign. I feel under qualified but I hope my words, with the spirit, might touch your heart.

We are all familiar with personal revelation. In the past conference there were several mentions of revelation, angels, and the holy ghost. Objectively and with hindsight, it seems easy-enough-to understand. I had this feeling, I followed the prompting, and HAZZAH! Life worked out.

However, the actual act of receiving personal revelation and understanding whether it is revelation or not can be tricky. All of us have wondered “was that just me wanting what I want, or was it the Holy Ghost inspiring me?”

Brother Carey asked me to focus on “free agency and guidance from the Holy Ghost”.  While there are dozens of discourses on personal revelation, I will be primarily quoting four General Authorities’ words: Neal A. Maxwell, Boyd K. Packer, Dallin H. Oaks, and Richard G. Scott.

Agency

Even in the garden of Eden, agency and accountability were present. Eve chose the fruit, her husband followed suit. After the Fall (which was necessary to the plan of salvation) Abel served God faithfully but Cain chose Satan. David triumphed over Goliath but fell into the adversary’s hands and Bathsheba’s arms. Nephi built a boat while Laman and Lemuel murmered. King Benjamin united his people in the love of God whereas King Noah destroyed generations of faith.

Each of these souls, as well as every other soul born on earth, are given two blessings without question: the light of Christ, to enlighten us during our second estate, and the ability to choose of our own free will-- agency.  

“Our agency is preserved by the fact that as we approach a given moment, we do not know what our response will be.  Meanwhile, God has forseen what we will do and has taken our decision into account so that His purposes are not frustrated…By Foreseeing, God can plan and His purposes can be fulfilled, but He does this in a way that does not in the least compromise our individual free agency.”

-          Elder Maxwell, All These Things Shall Give Thee Experience

“You have your agency, and inspiration does not—perhaps cannot—flow unless you ask for it…. No message in scripture is repeated more often than the invitation, even the command, to pray—to ask. Prayer is so essential a part of revelation that without it the veil may remain closed to you. Learn to pray. Pray often. Pray in your mind, in your heart. Pray on your knees.”

-          Boyd K. Packer

Prayer and Study

Why is prayer so essential to revelation? I love how Elder Maxwell phrases it:

“Prayer is that point where the agency of man meets the omniscience of God.”

“So very much of pure prayer seems to be the process of first discovering, rather than requesting, the will of our Father in heaven and then aligning ourselves therewith…it is vital, therefore, that we open our souls to Him and tell Him what our concerns are now, as well as acknowledge what we now are, for this is a part of the process of aligning ourselves with His will.”

-          Elder Maxwell

This doctrine amazes me—discovering and then aligning ourselves with God’s will through prayer. This is something I am working on, but one thing that has helped me is to ask to know God’s will and then pray for the courage to follow it.  

Revelation is not easy, but Elder Scott has excellent counsel:

“When I am faced with a very difficult matter, this is how I try to understand what to do. I fast. I pray to find and understand scriptures that will be helpful. That process is cyclical. I start reading a passage of scripture; I ponder what the verse means and pray for inspiration. I then ponder and pray to know if I have captured all the Lord wants me to do. Often more impressions come with increased understanding of doctrine. I have found that pattern to be a good way to learn from the scriptures.”

Elder Scott combines fasting, prayer, pondering, the word of God, and recording inspiration or impressions. The Lord counsels us in the Doctrine and Covenants that

“you must study it out in your mind; then you must ask me if it be right, and if it is right I will cause that your bosom shall burn within you; therefore, you shall feel that it is right.”

I am a firm believer in recording spiritual impressions, especially priesthood blessings.  That has been such a comfort to me—to look over previous blessings my father has pronounced on me and be reassured that everything will work out, and to recall spiritual impressions I might have forgotten.

Understanding the Holy Ghost

If we were to all take personality tests in this room, we would cover the full spectrum. Introverts, extroverts, blue, red, yellow, you name it. Just as there are varying personalities there are various ways of feeling the Spirit.  No two people are identical in their spiritual experiences. 

I suggest that we all read our patriarchal blessing and look for phrases in regards to the Holy Ghost, revelation, or prayer.

It is apparent in my own patriarchal blessing that Heavenly Father understands my predisposition to use intuition—phrases that I will “sense and know the desires of my Heavenly Father”, or that through the scriptures I will “feel, sense, and hear” his counsel further affirm that I am His daughter and He knows me personally.

General Authorities offer different ways we can experience the Holy Ghost when we are seeking revelation. Elder Dallin H. Oaks stated in a devotional to BYU students,

“Revelation is communication from God to man. It can occur in many different ways. Some prophets, like Moses and Joseph Smith, have talked with God face to face. Some persons have had personal communication with angels. Other revelations have come…“through the dreams of sleep or in waking visions of the mind.

In its more familiar forms, revelation or inspiration comes by means of words or thoughts communicated to the mind, by sudden enlightenment, by positive or negative feelings about proposed courses of action, or even by inspiring performances, as in the performing arts.”

President Boyd K. Packer offers that

“the burning in the bosom {spoken of in the scriptures} is not purely a physical sensation. It is more like a warm light shining within your being.  The Holy Ghost speaks with a voice that you feel more than you hear. It is described as a “still small voice.” And while we speak of “listening” to the whisperings of the Spirit, most often one describes a spiritual prompting by saying, “I had a feeling …”

Elder Scott adds that “two indicators that a feeling or prompting comes from God are that it produces peace in your heart and a quiet, warm feeling”

Many scriptural references on revelation include the Spirit enlightening both the mind and heart.  Enos described the voice of the Lord coming into his mind. President Romney affirmed this, acknowledging he was personally well-acquainted with the Spirit coming into his mind in words and sentences.

Furthermore, a good scripture to judge by is incidentally quite short and President Hinckley’s favorite: D&C 50:24

“And that which doth not edify is not of God, and is darkness.”

Enhancing Revelation

There are tricks to enhance revelation. We must be in-tune and worthy of the Holy Ghost. President Packer warned of vital areas to be aware of when seeking revelation-- make sure you are abiding by the Word of Wisdom (including adequate rest and food). Enjoy wholesome music.  Be reverent, visit the temple, avoid and shun temptation.

Elder Scott urges us to not yield to emotions of hurt, anger, or pride

“Humility is a fertile soil where spirituality grows and produces the fruit of inspiration to know what to do. It gives access to divine power to accomplish what must be done.

Our Heavenly Father did not put us on earth to fail but to succeed gloriously. It may seem paradoxical, but that is why recognizing answers to prayer can sometimes be very difficult. Sometimes we unwisely try to face life by depending on our own experience and capacity. It is much wiser for us to seek through prayer and divine inspiration to know what to do. Our obedience assures that when required, we can qualify for divine power to accomplish an inspired objective.”

I am an independent girl.  It is hard for me to accept help but I have learned in the last year the importance of humility, that I can’t do this—any of this—on my own.

About 8 months ago, I was in the depths of a decision and heartache. I battled with trying to decipher what I wanted and what the Lord wanted.  Sometimes when I prayed I wanted to just throw my hands up and say “Okay God, just tell me what to do because this is too hard!”

But he didn’t, because I had to utilize my agency and come to my own conclusion. Because He loved me, and knew I needed to grow.  

So I made my decision, and I prayed like crazy. I went to the temple. I read the scriptures, my patriarchal blessing.  I did everything in my power, I received a witness in my mind and in my heart. But there was a missing piece to the puzzle, and seemingly overnight everything fell apart. In the aftermath I asked my friend how to reconcile my spiritual experiences with what happened. She told me “we receive impressions for different reasons, for things that we mortally cannot comprehend or for things that never come to pass”

Then she asked what I had learned from the experience.

Here’s what I learned:

Tender mercies exist.  The Lord is my older brother—he loves me and supports me, he understands my heart, knows when I hurt, and He can heal me.  Completely.  He has given me strength and courage beyond what I am capable of. God has a plan for me—and it’s bigger than I can understand. The priesthood is real, God’s promises are real. God answers prayers, and His word is the way to peace and happiness. My family and friends are angels, and my family on the other side are rooting for me.

God will help you know what is right. Oftentimes it is difficult to differentiate between our wants and the spirit but I promise that He will not lead you astray; if you follow the Holy Ghost you will be on the path you need to be. When your desires, even righteous desires, are not in accordance with God’s will or plan for you, it is hard. Believe me, I know. But I love this quote by Elder Maxwell:

“The time will come when we will thank Him for saying ‘no’ to us in regard to some of our petitions.  Happily, God in His omniscience can distinguish between our surface needs (over which we pray most fervently) and our deep and eternal needs.  He can distinguish what we ask for today and place it in relationship to what we need for all eternity.  He will bless us, according to our everlasting good, if we are righteous”

-          Elder Maxwell

“So trusting my all to thy tender care, and knowing thou lovest me, I’ll do thy will with a heart sincere: I’ll be what you want me to be”