better

"i don't think better exists."

that's what i said. because, how can it possibly?

with the best thing next to you, terror creeps in-- terror that the best will escape from your grasp. it paralyzes your breathing while simultaneously fortifying walls around your heart. but if you are to have any hope of making things work, and work to make them great, you have to be vulnerable.

it's a catch 22. 

i wish there was a "money back guarantee" of sorts with relationships. 

doesn't work out?? here's your heart and time back! 

just keep your receipt. 

alas. love does not have any guarantees. however, i truly believe that "the lord compensates the faithful for every loss".  and so. if something better exists {which defies all my imagination and logic and sensation} it will come and find me. 

i still stand behind my statement that "i don't think better exists".

so i am being vulnerable. i am being ignorant to dastardly possibilities and believing that what i hold will not disappear. i am believing that the best is not only yet to be, but at my side and in my arms.

*i am counting down the days to general conference and a weekend of beautifully wonderful fantastic food, family, and friends.