it comes and goes in waves

i have swam inshore enough to only feel the gentle lap of your absence. with the sun’s illumination i find seashells beneath the foamy trace of a wave and bask in my wet footprints trailing after me.

i am not drowning in solitude without you {as I was last year};

i am not treading water with no end in sight.

but on occasion, the moon shifts and the high tide rushes in, dissolving my infinite footprints and collection of shells, my intricate sandcastle and sandy soft towell.  the undercurrent, with its invisible power, is towing me out to sea where wave after wave crashes and crushes me.

 the sea weed is entangling my reasons.

bubbles of promise are bursting.

the lulls have s t r e t c h e d into weeks between impact, rather than the initial mere minute breaks between walls of water. every wave is different, unpredictable.

missing you

it comes and goes in waves.

but what is constant is wanting to be with you, in the mountains, far away from this ocean.

no one else but you.