why can't we be friends?

dynamics are ever changing. nothing is ever really stagnant between two people.
i believe it is plausible, logical, AND even  possible to be friends with boys. just friends. that there can be a mutual understanding of no interest in dating.
i believe i have found that, several times over.

apparently {according to my my brother} i am dead wrong.

it's been difficult for me to dismiss his counter argument to mine because... frankly, he knows me better than anyone. we have this strange bond and he just knows how i work internally. plus, he has never been wrong before about me and a boy. ever.

with that preface, i shall now explain the conversation which exuded my naivety about the opposite sex.

apparently, boys don't just want to be friends.

apparently, when boys give you a back rub that means something.

or when they spend lots of time with you.

or when they actually call you rather than text.

or when they rearrange plans for you.

or when they pay for you.

.....

yikes....

but

from my perspective, these two gentlemen that the above mentioned things may have occurred with just see me as one of the guys; a friend. they talk about other girls, for heavens sake-- how am i to know whether they're interested or not? or if i'm "on their radar"?
you see, when i spend time with these boys i clearly get the friend vibe. which is a-okay! but third party-ers insist the boy is interested. in me. not the gorgeous floosie over there, but me.

I HATE DATING and EVERYTHING 

THAT LEADS OR DOES NOT LEAD TO IT!

that is my rant.

so....
saturday ended splendidly with my {boy} friend. we had spent most of the entire weekend together and i felt perfectly comfortable-- overjoyed i had a not-new but newly-good friend. i even opened up about huntman. like, really opened up. and he told me about a girl he was interested in.
we shared. like friends do.
i was so content to have a  legitimately good guy friend again -- that i can be  both serious and funny with. 

u n f o r t u n a t e l y,
sunday's conversation with my family made me second guess my interpretation of the weekend

and

apparently, i gave 2 boys the green light this week.
i had no idea there was even a stop light!

i am still incredibly naive i suppose.
but, i do know that my feelings have ever so slightly been altered to accommodate for the possibility.  which i really really did not want, because

why can't we be {just} friends?

or perhaps more more importantly,  

why can't i remain satisfied with that?