i'm certain. hypothetically speaking, that is.

this post needs to be written. although. . .

i'm not quite sure how to do it.

hypotheticals always work, right?

it makes life seem much more solve-able; doesn't require a blood confession or the ownership of a complicated situation one might find themselves in.

hypothetically. if you're into hypotheticals.

if interrogated, you merely brush away the nuisance with, "it was a hypothetical."

but some things... are not hypothetical-able.  

such as my current situation.

but we'll pretend it is.

so
hypothetically speaking...

scratch that.

what if you liked your best friend for a long time. say, 4 years.
there was history; there was something there. but it wasn't enough. and the timing was never in sync.

and they left.

while they were gone,
you fell madly in love with their cousin. head over freaking heels.

while with said cousin,
you were certain

purely absolutely positively certain

that there was just residual liking from the first love. and you still cared but.

now the cousin is gone, too.

and yesterday {literally} your best friend
came home.

and today,

today you are sitting at home

writing this blog post,

instead of rushing into his arms.

like you always envisioned you would.

...up until falling in love with his cousin, that is.


hypotheticals are always a dead-give-a-way. so i'll stop with the 3rd person narrative now.



i'm nervous to see him.
we have a lot of memories. we've had quite the history.
but it's all so different now. how could it ever be the same?

2 years ago...

my what has changed since then. how i have changed.
how what i know and want have changed.
and yet,

how little.

"what do we do now?"

"it will come to us"

-meet joe black-