it came during class. this week i've actually been trying to apply what i learn to my own life. crazy, i know.
apostrophe #1
forgiveness does not equal trust.
i felt that by withholding my trust, i was impeding my own mercy. but this is not so.
that would just be idiotic.
i feel justified that my religion teacher wrote upon the board,
"forgiveness does not equal trust"
apostophe #2
there are egoists. and there are altruists.
of course, everyone prefers to be the later. but, everyone is the former, at one point in time or another.
what really matters is how you view others.
i discovered that i {shameful as it may be} view just about every male upon the planet as an egoist. just in it for the thrill. hit it and quit it. use and abuse.
and then when they're done with you, they upgrade to the next best cell phone. because, that's what girls are to them-- tools for their own self-gratification.
i am aware this sounds... harsh. but... given my {recent} history, it's not surprising i feel this way at times.
the problem occurs when you meet an altruist. they rub your feet and do your dishes and love you like there's no tomorrow. they love you for you. not because you give heavenly head massages and not because you're the world's best kisser (although, those are definitely perks) but because it makes you happy. even if they did not receive a single peck, they would love you just to see you smile.
when an altruist loves you, you keep waiting for their hedonistic nature to spring forth and burst your bubble of bliss. but, they're an altruist. and they're just about perfect...
the world needs more altruists, damn it.
2 comments:
Becky! I just barely saw your comment and it makes me laugh because Kelsey told me about you too and I've been following your blog! I think we have a LOT A LOT in common and lots to talk about. Friends it is :) Send me a little message and tell me your story!
Piggy!!!!! I love it and understand it perfectly!
Last year when I was having a very difficult few weeks, and trying to figure out how you forgive someone when they are, well, the way they are, and do and say pretty unbelieveable things, I sat at the cememtary and talked and cried to my Grandpa, asking him how I could forgive...
Yes, I did just say that! I collected myself and took my semi red face to family home evening at my Grandma's and made sure I got my Grandpa's scriptures because I wanted to be as close to him as possible. In the front of his scriptures there was a sentence in red scripture pencil, it said, "Forgiving another frees me."
I was just what I was looking for and realized that it was exactly what I needed to do, not for the person but for my own health!
Just like you said, it does not mean you have to trust them, but I completely agree that it "frees" you!
I wrote it out on a sticky note and it is stuck on the wall upstairs right next to my bed, in red scripture pencil.
I love you and miss you bunches! Can't wait to see in roughly 6 weeks!!!
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